Friday, August 10, 2012

Details

              I have learned more details about Monday morning from my co-workers who helped me during my seizure. Duchess was beside herself which I don't blame her at all for being really upset. These service animals many times will blame themselves if you end up in a situation like having a seizure even though they may not be at fault. Duchess while I was seizing was digging in my purse and brought my co-worker Michele my glucose tabs like I had trained her to do at home. She is so smart and even though she did not understand that it was too late for the glucose tabs. It goes to show you how much she cares for me. I know she is my best friend and loves me so incredibly much. During my second seizure which of course I really have little recognition of I was told I was petting Duchess while I was seizing. I know when I came out of the first one she was very upset and was so stressed. I know I must have been trying to calm her while I was having my second seizure. I know everyone was amazed by our relationship in some ways.



               I do remember some parts of my first seizure which has never happened before. I remember starting to come out of the seizure and I could feel the pain from the seizing of my body and it was terrible. I know I remember seeing all the people standing around and watching me. I hated to see the looks of pity and concern because it was all too much. Coming back to work after my seizure has been difficult I am tired of hearing people constantly asking if I'm okay or what caused it. All I get is the look of pity, which is the last thing I want. I really wan to move on from being the talk of the office. I honestly have been so embarrassed by the whole situation not that this was the first time this has happened. I know people care but, it just feels so over whelming right now to deal with it. I did get several comments from people I work with they never really saw the need for my service dog until this happened and they said they got a glimpse into how difficult things could be for me at times. It is nice for people to have some perspective on this. I was asked to teach a class to a set number of people and what to do during an emergency and so forth. I will be teaching it next week. I am hoping I can put together a real simple instructions because this experience was chaotic to say the least.

2 comments:

  1. Hey Tarra,

    Thanks for sharing your stories about you and Duchess.

    It's unfortunate that it took the work seizure to give people some insight on what you deal with daily; as you mentioned sometimes a situation that strips you of control is when other people get closer to 'getting it'.
    I've had friends for 10ish years that didn't realize how much effort 'good' control takes until we shared a not so positive experience.

    Good luck on teaching your class, I think that's a great idea.

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  2. It is sad but a good reminder sometimes how easy it is not too understand what it is like living with a chronic illness. I teach classed to staff at the University I work for but this time its some what personal.

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