Monday, April 13, 2015

The Past and My Parents

I know recently I have been blessed to have been able to see my best friend more often. We have been best friends since we were 12 years old. The best part is that we always stayed in contact and a great deal of our twenties were spent living far apart but thankfully I was always able to call her and keep in touch. I know we were discussing the past over dinner last night. I know my childhood was far from normal but I have to give my parents credit there was no pediatric Endocrinologist in the area so I went to a Dr. and my Dr followed what my parents requested of them. My mother made it her mission to take great care of me by being a nurse and being able to handle all the medical terminology. I know they did the best they could.

So with the fact that there was limited experienced Dr.'s I spent a great deal of my childhood not doing what most children were doing. I know my parents did not trust that other people could handle watching me or handle my injections. Thankfully some family members were able to help. I know I grew up not being able to do some things but thankfully as I got older they finally allowed me to do what I liked. The issue for me is that I had no idea what to do because I felt like to have so much freedom as a teenager was such a foreign thing to me. I did participate in sports, ballet as a child and other activities but most of the time my parents were always there. I know because of the seizures over the years were scary beyond belief for my parents but especially me.

I know my twenties I tried to make up for the fact that I had grown up way too young I was an adult way too early and way to serious. I also know the my shyness was due to several factors my diabetes and my parents always being present. I also know that I am very thankful though my time away from them was limited but they did a great job of taking us kids to plays, orchestra, concerts, camping, hiking and other activities. I know at the end of the day fear was a huge part of why my childhood was the way it was.

 I know I am thankful that I am so much more daring than my parents. I know my father still today thinks I can't do so many things but he is wrong. I know I will be unable to share with him my continuing adventures of sky diving because he tell me I shouldn't. I feel like now as an adult if I enjoy it I am going to find a way to do it. There is risks but I know I felt like I lived my life way to sheltered and I know that my Adrenaline Rushes seems to allow me back a piece of my childhood in some ways which is incredible.

I know my dad will never support me running a half marathon or pushing myself physically because he just doesn't seem to understand that we all are capable of doing things everyone else can. I know I do have Hypoglycemia Unawareness and I do plan on discussing my sky diving that I plan on doing with my Endocrinologist. I know they will support me need to continue to push to achieve my goals with some adjustments. I have do so many fun things as an adult and I will continue to find a ways to try all the new adventures I can. I know my friend felt bad or sad how tough things were for me but I also know life is tough at times. I am at least trying to make up for lost time. I think I enjoy it even more now then I would have when I was younger.

I had awesome parents and have been blessed but we all make mistakes and i know my mom worried about me constantly. I know they all worked together to make sure I always had health insurance and that I had the medications I needed. I know there is no manual for parents of type 1 children and everyone's Diabetes is different. I know my mothers Diabetes affected her in different ways than it did for me. I love them and I have leaned a great deal about how much they loved me by going to such depths to make sure I had what I needed.

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