Hiding Behind It

             I was talking with my friend who I have not seem much of recently because I have been working so much. She pointed something out to me that I had not really thought much of or realized. She pointed out that my pump site in my arm was slightly showing under the edge of my short sleeve. I asked her why that was a big deal but then she pointed out that most of the time she has never seen my sites being anywhere close to visible. I have spent most of my life hiding I was a diabetic and I am not a hundred percent sure why. I normally hide my pump sites and try to hide all my gear I guess for my own privacy. I have always been a very private person and I have always struggled with being able to tell people I was diabetic. I am not as fear less as Kerri from "Six Until Till Me' is and I have been working on it over the years. I have made some huge strides in my life now that I am telling more people without worry and also educating more at the same time. I am in some ways in the spotlight of sorts because of Duchess and how she draws attention. I can't really hide from my diabetes the way I have in the past which is good because I need to face things head on. I do take care of myself but I rarely every share my diabetes issue with others until I lost my mother. I was doing more educating about diabetes the past several years than I ever have before and it has given me a deal of unexpected blessings.

                                                     

              I have been wearing my pump sites on my arms more frequently and I honestly do not care if they are visible even at work. I do have them showing during exercise which is not new. I know my co-workers look at me funny but one of them says I understand you need to move them around and if your arms are easy you are going to put it there. I have to admit that I am not ashamed to be diabetic. I have worn my pump showing on my pants on a clip pretty often but the tubing is hidden until recently I have been a little more haphazard with the tubing in that I have no desire to spend so much time hiding it. I have also have been putting my sites on my legs and don't care if they are seen. It feels good not to worry about if some one can see it or not. I have been trying recently to put aside my need for privacy in order to educate others instead of hiding behind my diabetes. Diabetes has been a part of my life for 32 years and there is no need to hide when there is so much to share.