New Goal

                 Since I now have a new Endocrinologist I can start to work on some new things this year. In particular growing up I was always told I was bad if I had a high or a low and that really makes life difficult. We all know that is unrealistic because you could eat the same lunch everyday and get different results. I am trying to work on being nicer to myself when I am high or low. I get very upset and can rage bolus from time to time. I am trying to relax and be kinder to myself we are all human and can make mistakes. I know I am usually pretty good when it come to carbohydrate counting but even with that you can easily underestimate or overestimate so easily. I know I get angry or grumpy as it is when I am low and I need to realize that I have struggled the my whole time as a diabetic which big extremely quick drops. I don't think there is always a way to avoid them but I am always trying. I am also working on finding ways to not feel so guilty if I have a high or low and move on from it. I know realistically that it is bad when you weeks of highs or low and that most of the time that is not the case and I need to be more forgiving with myself. I work very hard to control my diabetes and need to find ways to continually reward myself for all the hard work. I know the new Dr. never said one word about missing a couple of 2 hour post meals but instead was like thank you for testing so much. It was nice to feel like someone noticed all the work I put into it. I am hoping to learn what I should of years ago. My blood sugars should have no reflection to who I am as a person but should be that I am person who tries. At the end of the day diabetes will never be easy but I will never put up with a Dr. who calls their patients bad because they have too many lows or highs instead of looking to how they can help the patient improve.

            

New Alert is Better than I Expected

                    I have been so pleased with Duchess and her progress with switching to her new alert with the Bringsel. She is alerting on her own by bringing me the Bringsel and it seems to be working great. In fact she seems much more enthusiastic about her job in general. She is alerting earlier which is wonderful. I know she was seeming burnt out to an extent but now she is back to alerting much sooner and with so much more exuberance. She in fact this week was showing them her new alert. She went desk to desk showing them her new alert. I need all the staff and manager to know anytime I change my alerts so they know what signals to look for if something is wrong. She has went to them before seizures at work which is what I need her to do. She continually amazes me at how fast she learns. She loves to learn new tricks or tasks. I am needing to come up with some new things to teach her soon to keep her mind active and alert.

Duchess with her Bringsel on her new Kuranda Dog cot at work.

         

New Endo

                    I went to my new Endocrinologist visit today and was pretty pleased. They came up with a new idea to deal with my infusion set issues. I am now doing hydrocortisone cream before I insert a new infusion set. They think my body is reacting to the infusion sets likes its a virus or foreign substance which I thought it was the issue all along. Hopefully that will work out. If not then I will switch to Apidra. They also are looking at my basal rates because my daily basal rate its 18 units and the carbs I am eating is on average only 5 units of insulin a day and I am actually full. They said normally it is a 50 percent basal and 50 percent bolus. I am not a big eater since I have been gluten free and honestly I am usually so busy eating does not always come first like it should. I also know that relates back to my eating disorder I have dealt with as well. I am glad this new Endocrinologist is now looking at other options to solve my issues. They are also looking at why I have Osteopenia which is basically per-osteoporsis at such a young age. They discovered by low bone density at age 29. I am glad someone seems to care about it as much as I do.

                       So far so good we will see what happens next appointment. They are looking at some other diabetic related things to get me back on track. I guess I will see where it all goes but really excited I was not lectured for having lows but instead was treated like a person who is trying to manage their diabetes. It was quite refreshing.

Lessons relearned

                          Saturday started out like a fairly normal day for me. I got up and had plans to meet a good friend for a birthday lunch. I had been looking forward to seeing her again it had been a while since we had been able to get together. Duchess absolutely adores my friend and she like her as well. So we had lunch and as usual when I went out I had a salad because it was the gluten free menu and I was okay with the salad choice. I brought a granola bar to eat because the salad dressing were the only carbs I was in-taking for lunch. I like to have some Kind bars on hand for such an occasion. I ate my salad and felt full so I decided to not eat the Kind bar. I have on occasion skipped lunch and felt it would be fine. I had breakfast that morning so I was very comfortable with my choice. So after lunch and shopping I headed home and then my pump site went bad so I changed it out. I started getting hungry and it was around dinner time so I decide I need to heat up some left over chili for dinner. I am in the kitchen and heating it up when my legs gave out from under me. I hit the floor and then my roommate heard me came to the kitchen and helped me to the couch and let me rest. He got me a glass of juice. I know Duchess had alerted before I went to the kitchen I really wish I had listened to her instead of ignoring her and went to go heat up some food.

                          I am not sure why I ignored her when she has never been wrong in her alerts. I have a feeling that my blood sugar dropped very quickly so I am sure that my thought process was very cloudy. When my blood sugars gets low quickly I get into a thick fog of sorts that I am so out of it. I know Duchess had went into my roommates bedroom before it happened to let them know but they were not sure what she wanted. I really struggle at times to do things such as test or treat lows when I am in the foggy thought processes most of the time I figure it out but it can take a while. I know this weekend was another good example of why I need to never ignore Duchess's alerts because honestly it is one of the few things these days that keeps me safe.

Rough Month So Far

                   It has been an interesting start to the new year so far. I am really making some big changes in my life from changing Endocrinologist, looking for a new job, changing Duchess alert for lows or highs and personal changes. I have found that January has been a terribly difficult month so far with having such a tough visit back home In December. Normally I come back from my time off with much more patience than this time around. I am planing not to visit home anytime soon because I am much more relaxed where I live or I just might make a much shorter trip. I know my family loves me but since they have forgotten how difficult things can be I find that I need to have more space, because they get angry if I'm too low or too high. I do my best to handle my diabetes but life has changed so much from over 4 years ago before I had hypoglycemia unawareness. I don't need my family sympathy just a little understand would go a long way. I also wish they could see how amazing Duchess is but I know that will never happen. So I am taking what I have learned and moving forward. I am hoping all these changes to come will help makes things easier in the long run.

This is my only picture of Duchess using a Bringsel to alert but her eye's look very devilish.

                    

Where I am Currently At

                I am finding that I am pulling myself out of diabetic burn out but it is really day by day. I am still missing on following up on some 2 hour blood sugars but I am getting most of them compared to before. I have not work my dexcom in a couple of weeks but I have been thinking about giving it another try. I think I needed a break from all the being woke up in the middle of the nights and the alarms which drive me crazy. I am working on logging my blood sugars but I am concerned because I have an up coming appointment my new Endocrinologist office. I also had too jump through referrals getting medical records sent before they would even let me schedule an appointment. Going to a new Endocrinologist office being burned out is less than ideal but I needed to make the change. So I really need this up coming appointment to go well because right not I'm not sure I can take another your a bad diabetic because you have so many lows. I am getting there step by step and I feel more optimistic about it but I am not quite there yet.

Are you Blind?

                         I had an interesting experience this weekend while I was leaving the grocery store. I had rented a red box movie and was returning it. I get approached by the woman who asks if I am blind which is quite funny because as I am talking with her I am inserting the movie in the return slot of the red box movie station. Then she asks since I am not blind what does she do. I told her she was a medical alert dog. So she asks again and your not blind no I have medical issues. This really seemed to puzzle the woman for a couple of minutes and she was so surprised that I could take Duchess in the store with me because of a medical condition. I mentioned that there is many disorders that are are hidden disabilities and I have one. I know she asked what my condition was but I knew it create a very long conversation and I needed to finish grocery shopping at the store. So I told her that I did not have time to discuss my personal health issues and had to go. Sometimes ignorance is bliss for some people but I have never quite had such a puzzled look from another person. I am sure she had a ton of questions but I find it funny because the woman had a sight issue herself. I am not quite sure what to think but all I know is that these crazy encounters are part of my life anytime I have Duchess with me. Who knows what I will encounter next but I honestly have to laugh at these encounters sometimes. I think laughter about diabetes and having a service dog is a great thing.

Video about Service dog Handlers

                 There is a You tube video about what people say to service dog handlers that is really so true. I just had to share because I think it is really funny but very accurate at the same time. Hope you enjoy the video as well. The language could bother some people just to warn you. I have experienced most of the things shown in the video. It is a crazy world sometimes having a service dog with you. I know I did not expect my life to be what it is but I try my best to ignore some of it.

                                                           http://youtu.be/iSn9WO1FCb0
 

                    An update on the bringsel training with Duchess is going so well. In fact she seems to be enjoying her job much more which is what I was aiming for. I will continue to update you on the progress of her training